Last fall, when my newly-minted 4-H member announced he wanted a cow for a 4-H project, my heart just about burst.
Growing up, my cows and calves had been my best friends. A long drama filled junior high school day faded away while sitting in the feed bunk watching the cattle eat. Cattle are the best listeners. They heard all of my woes and never offered unsolicited advice.
After consulting with My Farmer – who is a grain farmer, not a livestock farmer and doesn’t want to be a livestock farmer – we decided to find a bucket calf (i.e. a calf that needs a little extra attention, or whose mama can’t or won’t care for it for whatever reason).
Enter Renee, an old 4-H acquaintance and farm gal who came home from college to build upon her family’s agriculture heritage. “I have a Brown Swiss heifer calf named Gabi,” she texted. That was the beginning of my farm boy’s first love affair.
I was worried about choring. Would the morning and night grind of bottle feeding, cleaning pens, and making friends with Gabi be too much for a nine-year old? But my farm boy never faltered. After two days of teamwork, I was informed I could stay in the house. He’s got this now. He dutifully cleaned pens, hauled water, and baled hay with Papa and Uncle Peter to work off his share for Gabi.
Teaching Gabi to lead for show was a test of endurance and patience for both animal and boy. Both being strong-willed the literal tug and pull brought both to their knees. But without too much instruction, my farm boy learned that an animal responds to requests and not demands. Before I knew it, the pair strolled around the farm morning, noon and night.
The Lee Co. 4-H Fair & Jr. Show was our first venture into a show ring. But it wasn’t show day or the ribbons or the premiums that made the impact. My farm boy was so relieved to have made it in and out of the ring, he sat right down in Gabi’s pen to give her a hug, realizing I think, that they were in this together. A team. Friends forever.
Eventually, Gabi needed to return to Renee and her farm. That was the plan all along. Gabi was our trial run, a test. Could we, as a family, do this – the chores, the training, the showing, the responsibility?
We decided to meet Renee at another county fair for the hand-off. We’d show, help Renee with her string of cattle and then leave Gabi to return to her original home.
At the fair, my farm boy gives Gabi some love before walking in the ring.
The above picture reminded me of this show day cira 1992(?). My “lily” white Holstein and I head for the ring. Can you guess her name? Lily!
After the show, my farm princess, farm boy and I explored the fairgrounds, ate a corn dog and sipped some lemonade. We sat quietly in the shade watching people. The quiet was awkward because I knew we all were avoiding the inevitable – saying good-bye to Gabi.
A final scratch, hug and whisper in the ear, my farm boy and farm princess say fare-well.
All the way home my farm princess sniffled declaring she was trying not to be sad because Renee “is a good farmer and loves her cows.” My farm boy stayed quiet.
It wasn’t until evening chores (barn cats and dog) when his reality set in. He shuffled up from the barn, crumpled into a kitchen chair and openly cried.
“I miss her, Mom,” he whispered. “Did you miss all your cows too?”
Absolutely, farm boy. Every good farmer does.
<3 this!!! I feel much the same as you and him.
great read, stirred emotions for me as well
Bless his heart. I know EXACTLY how he feels. It’s never easy. And you can tell him, I’ve had many guys that stood within a few feet from me, feeling the same way, too. Always. But we all grow up with those memories. A day comes when those memories can get a smile out of us. And that becomes an extra special reward we get for all the challenge we were willing to win!
Made me remember saying goodby to my first horse that was on loan!
Oh goodness sakes, I’m sitting here with tears in my eyes! I fondly remember similar situations.
Thanks all for reading and sharing your personal stories. So true, the life of a livestock farmer, caring for them is a science, loving them is an art.
This is such a sweet post. I think I miss Gabi too 😉
Oh my goodness! I’m trying not to cry! What a sweet story.
Love it! So glad you were able to come back to the world of show heifers. Some of my show heifers were my best friends. My sister names her show heifers after her best friends (we had to explain that was a compliment)! Here’s to finding next year’s 4-H project.
http://www.crystalcattle.com
what happens to these ‘friends’ when they are waved goodbye and they always are waved goodbye….on their way to slaughter. Which a child’s genuine concern for the animals, how sad…. hmmmm, different kind of story I guess.
Part of the greater lesson of caring for livestock is that their purpose is to provide for us in death. Therefore, we provide for them in life – giving them care, food, water and shelter. I didn’t relish sending my animals to market, but I did begin to understand the cycle of life on the farm, and that I was just as important to those animals as they were to me and my family.
As a side note, Gabi is a brown swiss heifer. She returned to our friend and will join her milking herd.